The excuses hall of shame for the phone call that never came

man lying on the phone

Ladies, we’ve all been there. We’ve all had at least that one guy that drops so many unbelievably wild excuses left and right, we actually believe them.

But this isn’t a sci-fi TV special about some mysterious place in technology where his phone call disappears. Nor is it Houdini’s best kept magic secret trick. This right here is your reality check. If your man’s dropping these lines, it’s time to drop his line and pick up a new one.

Women : victims or bitches?

Here’s a list of my all-time favorite excuses: Some have happened to me, some to my friends and some are a result of my explosively painful imagination (though I’m willing to bet good money these have all happened somewhere, sometime to some poor little someone). Right next to the amateur “dog ate my telephone,” here is the Excuses Hall of Shame:

(Click on each excuse for my own answer)

 1. My car broke down.

(Honey, it’s not 1955 – call AAA)

 2. I got stuck at home with my parents.

(What are you? Five?)

 3. I didn’t have enough money to take you out, so I got embarrassed.

(Thanks, but I’m not dating a credit card)

 4. I forgot my phone in my friend’s car and he drove to another country with it.

(Okay really, that’s just insulting my intelligence)

 5. I was in a meeting really late.

(Was it a blackout? Because you couldn’t reach me not by phone, text, Whatsapp, BBM, e-mail, Twitter or Facebook)

 6. We talked last night?

Memory loss at this age?

 7. My phone was on silent

(Oh yeah, forgot about that very important meeting in which you were saving the world)

 8. I saved your number wrong

(This one’s a classic – short, to the point and impossible to argue with – the perfect getaway).

 9. I don’t check my phone in the morning – I only check it four hours after I get into the office.


And finally, my ultimate favorite: 10. The one where you get no call/response at all.

(I like to pretend they got married or died)

There it is, the Excuses Hall of Shame. Ladies, consider this your gracious warning label.

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